For a study of marital togetherness and apartness, the partners in 136 couples completed questionnaires. The role of disrespect, a factor that might serve as an abrasive in marriage, was investigated. Couples above average on disrespect spent more time apart on days when there had been a big fight, considerable annoyance, or anger; couples below average on disrespect spent more time together on days when there had been a big fight, considerable annoyance, or anger. This finding suggests that therapy for couples with a presenting problem of insufficient contact may first have to deal with abrasive factors.