Drawing on Maturana's concept of structure determinism and Bowlby's attachment theory, a model of marital interactions is described based on the nature of the “fit” between each individual's belief systems, particularly those related to the fears inherent in intimacy. It is proposed that these marital interactions can be either belief‐con firming, leading to alienation, conflict and unhappiness, or belief‐disconfirming, leading to intimacy, successful conflict resolution and happiness. Suggestions are made as to how therapists can intervene in troubled relationships to facilitate negative belief‐disconfirming interactions, interrupt negative belief‐confirming interactions and prevent the development of negative belief‐generating